Slime Pellet Rations

Normal dungeon slimes are completely inedible and somewhat toxic to eat. In rare instances when a slime grows very large the toxins get so dilute that the slime’s natural secretions become edible if unpalatable.

If the secretions of a slime of more than 10 HD are collected and dried they form a pellet the size of a chicken’s egg. This pellet can be eaten and provides as much sustenance as a days worth of rations. For each 10HD one pellet can be prepared each day. The pellets last 100 years in any conditions before disintegrating. The pellet re-hydrates when exposed to saliva and chewed. It takes on the taste and consistency of mucus. If the Judge wants a DC 5 Fortitude save can be imposed to successfully choke down the slime ration.

Far away in an unnamed dungeon a foul warlock named Nedis had sequestered himself to protect a foul curse that had been set upon the world. In this dungeon was a giant slime named Cornix. Nedis discovered that he could sustain himself on the dried drippings that slowly oozed out of the pool that Cornix was in.

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Ever Smoking Pipe

When this pipe is found, usually discarded in a corner of a dungeon, it has a curl of smoke coming up from it. There is no medium burning in this pipe. A wizard who come into possession of this pipe gains a very powerful benefit. Whenever the caster is subject to corruption, from any source, the caster may choose between the corruption result rolled or the result one point higher on the table.

This pipe has no known history, though it has some initials inscribed on it’s side J R B D.

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Loincloth of Delusion

Loincloths do not provide any protection against swords and axes. Unfortunately for warriors who stumble upon this loincloth it casts an enchantment on any who catch sight of it. Any warrior who sees this loincloth must make a DC 20 Will save or believe that this loincloth is both magical and grants an armor class equal to that of full plate mail, but without the check penalty. Failing the Will save also indicates that the warrior will wear this loincloth and discard their regular armor as inferior.

This loincloth was made by the serpent demon Jefaxzyrg. A certain lawful deity had guided the hand of a rather dimwitted knight through a long series of quests. The dimwitted knight had collected a full set of lawful magical arms and armor. The knight was closing in on the portal to the demiplane of Jefaxzyrg. For the first time in 7 demoniac aeons which have no corresponding number of human years, being both longer and shorter than human timescales, Jefaxzyrg felt the fear of mortality grip his tripateral chambers. He needed a weakness to exploit if this knight ever made it to him. Jefaxzyrg then made this loincloth, and placed it in a chest owned by some chaotic creatures in the knights path.

Rumor has it that Jefaxzyrg also made a corresponding version for any women too modest to wear only a loincloth, so there is a possibility that there exists a Chainmail Bikini of Delusion as well.

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Manacles of the Maniac

This set of manacles looks like it has seen long use, full of wear marks, but otherwise in excellent condition. When placed on a creature, it must make a DC 18 Will save or be driven temporarily insane. The insanity takes the form of a stark raving madness, with foaming at the mouth and outbursts; including pacing, yelling and screaming. Animals have a similar pacing and growling or yelping symptoms.

As a backup the creator of these manacles added an illusion. Should the creature make the Will save the illusion kicks in. Everyone looking at the creature must make a DC 15 Will save or see the creatures mouth move and hear it make mumbling sounds. The lock on these manacles is of exceptional quality and is slightly magical. It requires a DC 25 pick locks check made by a Thief who also has at least a d14 in cast spell from scroll.

These manacles were made by the serpent demon Jefaxzyrg to aid Lord Dubloich in his political maneuverings. Lord Dubloich would often seek to use rumor and innuendo to destroy his political rivals. First he would sew rumors about his rivals growing insanity. Then he would have his rival kidnapped. Peasants would be paid to be beaten and claim it was at the hands of the rival. Then Lord Dubloich would attach these manacles to the rival and parade them about town before having them sent to a madhouse he ran in the countryside.

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Socks of the Road

This pair of socks is made for comfort and durability. Once per week, while wearing these socks, the wearer can walk through the night and still gain all the benefits of a full nights rest (hp, temporary stats, spells, etc.).

When found there is a 10% chance that these socks are cursed, and upon putting them on the wearer is forced to walk without stopping (or pace in a circle if confined, thrusting their legs as if walking if restrained). They take 1 hp of damage for every mile traversed after the first 8 hours until they drop dead from exhaustion.

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Whiskeyskin of Transmutation

This waterskin looks like a regular waterskin. It is only when the owner fills it that its magical properties become apparent. Twice per day any liquid placed in it turns into a strong whiskey after 1 turn. The flavor and quality of the whiskey are dependent upon the quality of the liquid put into the skin. Muddy or fouled water or similar liquid turns into a unpalatable rotgut. Clean water turns into an average whiskey. Fine wine turns into a high quality whiskey.

Ole’Man Yellow-Pall (no one knew his real name, Knarf Gallbladder) was a regular at the tavern called Brews to Choke on, owned by old Choker himself. His love of whiskey was unparalleled and for years you could tell how much coin he’d come across recently by how deeply yellow the color of his skin was. Tragically one day, waking up in his usual place to sleep, the gutter, he spied a tarnished and scratched silver ring. Realizing this would keep him in whiskey for a few weeks he quickly grabbed it and stuck it on his finger. Immediately upon putting it on he heard a voice in his head informing him he could use the ring to wish for magical properties to be placed on one item. With only a moments thought he wished for a waterskin that would turn any liquid put in the skin to whiskey.

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Scabbard of Sharpening

This leather scabbard has been polished through long use and frequent care. When a sword is inserted into it for 12 or more hours it gives the blade an unnatural sharpness. The first 10 hits with this sword get a +1 bonus to attack and damage rolls. This effect fades once the sword is used 10 times or is unsheathed for more than 1 hour.

Dwarven smiths of old would make scabbards like these to give to their best human allies, granting them an advantage right at the start of combat. There are rumors that the dwarves reserved for themselves much rarer and more magical versions that had the same effect on a battle axe in its hanger. All without having to touch the axe’s blades.

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Hand Mirror of Hideousness

This hand mirror is much prized by vain nobility. It reflects upon its holder a most hideous visage, a terrible corruption of their own face. If the holder stares at it for 1d3 minutes without blinking, it transmutes their face into a prettier version. This has no effect on the holders personality. Should they blink before 1d3 minutes passes however, their face transmutes to be as bad as the vision they saw while looking at it, and oftentimes worse.

On the back of the mirror is a badly written poem that serves as the instructions:

Face your inner self unblinking for minutes thrice,
Your visage will soon be nice,
Fail to head this missive and be punished by your vice

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Kralophanous’s Resting Cushion

This cushion doubles as a pillow. Each night spent sleeping with this cushion under the user’s head grants an extra 1d3 hp in healing. Every night spent this way also causes dreams in which the user is more and more comfortable and attached to the pillow, dreams like being in a luxurious inn, or lounging in a hammock on a warm day. After using this cushion 7 times the user must make a DC 10 Will save, each time it is successful the DC increases by 1 the next time it is used (10, then 11, then 12 and so on). If it fails the user falls into a deep, paralyzed stupor for Xd3 hours, where X is the number of times the cushion has been used successfully.

Kralophanous had been a con artist before entering a life of wizardry. He devised this pillow once when his research funds were in danger of running low a few months before his research finished. Kralophanous would take the pillow and travel a good distance from where people knew him and assume the name of one of his rivals. He would then gift it to an unpopular minor noble, and once the paralyzing stupor took effect, Kralophanous would bribe or trick his way past the noble’s servants. He would then steal all the valuables and threaten anyone who got in his way with his terrible magics.

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Champlain’s Tick-tock Thresher

This mystical machine was made to be a self loading automatic threshing machine. It’s articulated arms will take any bagged grain or corn within 15 feet and load them automatically. The machine will perform any and all of the following actions; winnow, thresh, husk, hull or otherwise prepare any grain or bean. It will then load the refined seed into bags and stack them neatly for movement or storage.

To maintain the magic it must be fed blood once a year. Traditionally a large sheep or ram would be fed into the hopper of the machine each fall. If this was ever forgotten, then the following harvest season some unfortunate user would have an ‘accident’ and be consumed while trying to prepare the magic machine for use. Should such a thing happen this mystical farm implement has a cumulative 5% chance of developing a nearly insatiable taste for human flesh and animating to satisfy it’s hunger. Once animated it has an uncanny ability to only move when no one is looking at it.

After his success with Cow Switch of Charming, Champlain set his sights on easing the other burdens of the farms near his tower. He built this clock gear based magic thresher to save the whole community the tremendous amount of time needed the thresh and otherwise prepare their grains.

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